Extinction Level Event
So, I was reading about the Tunguska meteor impact the other day.
Yeah, that’s kinda how I roll.
Anyway, I learned that the chunk of space rock that decided to mess up Siberia’s shit hit with the force of several thermonuclear blasts. Yeah. Several. No matter how hard we try to make bigger and bigger weapons, nature beats us every time.
Remember those asteroid disaster movies of the late 90s? In those, we really had no existing plan for a huge meteor crashing into the planet. The best we could come up with was Bruce Willis and Ben Affleck in a space shuttle. Now that the shuttle program’s been scrapped, we don’t even have that. We’re in trouble, folks. Um, hypothetically.
So, I know a lot of you are science nerds like me. What should our space-rock strategy be? My plan has something to do with robots and…
I’ve said too much already.
Share your ideas in the comments!
Effing lasers mounted on a HumVee, like all of our other strategies.
Flying Humvees would be best. And not that helicopter one they tried to sell to the DoD a couple of years back.
Clearly, our only hope is for a child to be born with oodles of long-range telekinetic ability…
If such a child were to exist, he or she would probably get kidnapped. You know, to up the drama factor and help Eddie Murphy resurrect his career with Golden Child 2: This Time, It’s Telekenetic.
Mine revolves around an orphan from a distant planet that gains power from our yellow sun……..
As long as it’s not the whiny, emo Superman from the last film…
There is only one (ok two) Supermen……and both are named Reeve(s) 😛
Realistically, I’d think they’d need some type of engines they could mount onto the asteroid. That way they could adjust the trajectory away from earth.